Survivor says prosecutors initially declined her case despite DNA match; urges responders to 'start by believing'

Diana Kobermeier, a survivor and longtime speaker on sexual‑assault response, told attendees at a Forensic Technology Center of Excellence webinar hosted by RTI International that police skepticism and an initial prosecutorial decision not to pursue charges delayed justice in her case even after forensic DNA tied her attacker to the crime.

Kobermeier described attending a 2006 birthday party where she became severely disoriented and later remembered only fragments of the night. "I remember waking up on the floor... my head was in the toilet," she said, recounting how she and her husband collected her clothing and reported the assault to police three days later.

She said a Kansas City police officer who took her statement later told her privately, "I don't think you were raped. I think that you ran a consensual affair," and advised her to get a SANE (sexual assault nurse) exam. Kobermeier credited her SANE exam and a hospital advocate with providing belief and support: the advocate "was the first person in all of this who told me she believed me."

After investigators obtained a warrant for the suspect's DNA, Kobermeier said lab backlogs delayed the report; when the results arrived she recalled her detective telling her the findings were "so conclusive" — she quoted the laboratory figure as a "1 in 9 quadrillion" chance it was not her attacker.

Despite that result, Kobermeier said the county prosecutor's office initially declined to file charges. She said a victim advocate in that office told her the reasons: "you consumed alcohol that night, and we have no proof that you said no," and that the act was a misdemeanor with the statute of limitations expired. Kobermeier said she confronted the prosecutor in person and was told, "I am not taking your case." She described being devastated by the declination but continued to pursue other avenues.

Kobermeier said she contacted the Missouri attorney general's victim‑advocate line and then reached out to her state representative, Tim Fluke, who intervened and encouraged the county prosecuting attorney Dan White to meet with her. White agreed to try the case; a grand jury returned an indictment, the matter went to trial, and the jury convicted the defendant of felony sexual assault.

She reported the jury’s sentence as a $5,000 fine and 30 days in jail and said the defendant was placed on the sex‑offender registry. Kobermeier added that a different county prosecutor later allowed the defendant to receive 10 years of probation and said he has since been accused in other alleged assaults that were not prosecuted.

From her experience, Kobermeier pressed two main reforms: that responders should "start by believing" survivors to counter stereotypes that lead to disbelief, and that agencies should improve communication and processes across police, medical, advocacy and prosecutorial roles. "Communicate. Listen," she told attendees. She also urged responders to practice self‑care to avoid burnout and secondary trauma.

In audience questions she recommended public awareness campaigns to broaden the public image of survivors and offered to share resources on memory recall and trauma‑informed interviewing. She said one concrete policy change she observed after her case was a hospital practice shift: emergency contraceptives (Plan B) are now offered when the patient is alone to avoid undue influence from accompanying persons.

RTI's host, Josh Vickers, closed the webinar by noting that the slide deck and Kobermeier's contact information would be shared in the event materials and that two related webinars in the series were scheduled for April 25 and April 30.

Kobermeier declined to use her full contact details during the session but provided an e‑mail and a website for follow‑up; she invited attendees to contact her for resources and consultation.